2004 April

 

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…heat is literally generated by resistance to the current of
divine Love itself, which is sometimes like an electromagnetic wave
(kundalini), sometimes like a white-hot fire burning off all residue
of not-Self, turning the bodymind into “gold” (and eventually the
white powder, or soma itself. *lol*). As the bodymind’s vibration-
rate quickens in response to the infinitely-rapid attention of (and
on) the divine, anything not like the divine is either transmuted or
thrown off. “Hell” is only the entrance to “Heaven,” the coronal
flames of the Inner Sun.

………………………………………

…Our dog of course speaks quite eloquently with her eyes and body language, and
one can sometimes hear/see her thoughts when really listening, but I
must admit she also seems to be trying to speak specific words sometimes.

………………………………………

Hey, you sayin’ my kid — er, dog — ain’t special? This is Lake
Wobegon, isn’t it? :-) Seriously though, I don’t disbelieve this
possibility at all. I have long felt that either animals are evolving
into self-aware “humanity” as humans prepare to move on to our next
station, or else we are finally letting go of our hubris to realize
that we and animals are not so different as we thought, or both. I am
most impressed with the language-grasp and poetic creativity of some
apes, parrots, and so forth, and the telepathic abilities of dogs and
cats. I have enjoyed some phenomenal communication with other
animals, including crows and cockroaches. When my wife once did a
reading on a parrot, she found it clearer and more intelligent than
some people. What were the dogs saying, by the way?

………………………………………

I have always wondered about the south-entrance phobia, as that seemed like an appropriate local response in the more tropical areas, where excessive heat and light are to be avoided, but not in our more northern latitudes. It always
seemed to me that the businesses on the north side of FF square, those with prominent southern entrances, were always more cheerful
and prosperous (in general) than their opposite counterparts on the shady south side with “proper” north-entrances.

And I am fascinated by your comments about the separative feel to the buildings, their general sense of isolation and lack of communal flow. I am wondering if the TMO has (at least unconsciously)
manifested the highly-artifical, separative state of CC itself! Self- sufficent, separate, disproportionate emptiness inside, unresponsive
to the environment… Sounds like CC to me! *lol*

If they genuinely want to promote user-friendly and communally- conscious buildings more conducive to GC, UC, and BC, the TMO (and
everyone interested in architecture for that matter) would do well to read and study and apply the principles outlined in Christopher
Alexander’s brilliantly beautiful masterpiece, “A Pattern Language” — now THAT is Veda!

………………………………………

FWIW, all I can say from my slight experience in watching some people
die, whether from the vantage point of this physical body and/or
while only in subtle body “attending” their passage, is that I have
never seen this particular silver cord personally. There does appear
to sometimes be a resting-and-healing period of a few days after
death. Sometimes the soul appears to be completely free of the body’s
ills immediately on passing, which it may experience as a great
blissful delight, but sometimes the pains seem to hang on for a bit,
whereupon the soul appears to be ministered to by other healers.
(Sometimes a soul goes through a period of *intense* remorse even
later than this.)

I have however on many occasions seen various subtle (and not-so-
subtle) cords or threads (apparently indicative of addictions, power-
trips, or just normal parenting) between people, and also on several
occasions running from a given person’s radiant “Higher Self” down
into that person’s heart. Perhaps it is this latter cord or thread
which is spoken of above. If so I have had no direct experience of
whether this cord somehow remains for any time after death, but my
intuition would be that it doesn’t — indeed, that “snapping” would
probably be what constituted death itself. Could be wrong though.
Life (pre- and post-death) is a mystery! :-)

………………………………………

…FWIW my understanding of bliss at present is, it is the “primal”
vibration of THAT or the Self or God — into which every
quality, “good” or “bad,” can be resolved (re-solved) with some
innocent attention. It is not actually an experience per se, but
rather our very Self recognizing itSelf. Suffering is evidently
bliss, albeit slightly misapprehended. By the same token we are all
walking around completely “enlightened,” but for a slight tendency to
misjudge or underestimate the utter perfection of this moment.

………………………………………

My experience: When one is doing the public teaching thing, imparting
mantras and so on, Maharishi-like darshan is there. It is apparently
at least in part a function of attention and projection: when one
(devotee) needs/desires a particular Maharishi-quality from THAT,
then THAT provides it. Two poles to the battery. However, this is all
still just a light-and-power-show, essentially and utterly unrelated
to enlightenment itself, or all of MMY’s devotees would surely be
enlightened by now. Darshan does not lead to enlightenment, unless
you are willing to say “to hell with this!” and take responsibility
for your own perceptions. Some people say they appreciate my light
and “high energy,” and so on; this is not me, any more than I am a
great demon put here to keep people in ignorance. All of that is just
a ripple-pattern between two points or echoes of THAT. Darshan is
still part of the I-thou dream. THAT — or “Brahman” — knowing
itSelf is realizing that it is ALL THAT; THAT alone IS; there is
no “I” and there is no “thou;” there is only THAT. Home at last.
Never “got” here, never “left.” Good to see you.

………………………………………

“Lowering the Bar: MMY”s CC or Painting the Target Around the Arrow”
I love the subtitle to this thread! And I’d like to add that if you
DON’T “paint the target around the arrow,” in fact if you don’t strip
away everything else but that target you painted around the arrow,
and even throw the target away, and finally the arrow too, and be
willing to stand completely in the black hole of your own (un)
knowing, your own truth, here and now, then you’re still going to be
bound to someone else’s reality — or more accurately, bound to your
take on someone else’s take on the truth — and living a lie.
Comfortable enough I suppose, but still a lie. But I guess not
everyone really wants to end it all, and that’s OK too. Nothing wrong
with a good dream! *lol*

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Oh, and by the way, I have levitated, or I should say, THAT has
infused this bodymind with bliss, and levitated it, and dissolved it,
and reformed it. I can almost guarantee you however that you will
never “see me FLY.” *lol* If you and I are in the “right” spacetime,
and THAT desires to do the same through us again, perhaps someday we
will do this together! I would love that! But I don’t have a whole
lot of say in the matter. *lol*

………………………………………

…as far as I can see anyhow, the realization of “Brahman”
apparently has nothing to do whatsover with flying, or the siddhis,
or states of consciousness, or any of those external criteria.
Nonetheless, it does identify itself, and others who have realized it
do describe many of the same “side-effects” or properties that I have
noted. But all of these trimmings are after the fact; I don’t know
any way to be “here” other than to surrender everything you think you
know — everything anyone else ever told you — and insist upon the
bare truth that remains. Then, as Peter has noted, you may well find
places where your stance apparently closely agrees with that of other
explorers.

………………………………………

It was in the gross physical, not just an inner consciousness thing, at least before we went up *lol* — didn’t have
*exactly* the same gross body when dematerializing and rematerializing and coming back down, I don’t think — but whose will
are we talking about? None of the siddhis that have ever come through
me have really been by “my” will, the one typing this. The desire for
something — some siddhi or whatever — spontaneously comes up and is
fulfilled through me or whoever when there is a need for it, and that
is evidently a function of THAT and the relationships and desires
among those participating. As far as I can see at the moment anyhow,
I have no control over any of this, and doubt I ever will. It would
seem at first glance anyhow to take all the fun out of life. That’s
essentially the only thing about this life that makes it still worth
living at all — that it is so very unpredictable. I think it is a
sheer fantasy of the ego to think it can control anything at all,
that it can do anything at all “at will.”

But as to “higher states” of consciousness — exactly! Brahman
realizing itself has nothing to do with higher states of
consciousness. Nothing to do with states of consciousness at all.
Believing that you will find fulfillment through the “higher states”
of consciousness is (IMO) utter folly, yet more of the old donkey-and-
carrot of other-referral.

…I couldn’t say if it is MMY’s; that is my whole point actually —
  we cannot truly live someone else’s criteria, ever. “Brahman” does
name itself, validate itself, and so on, but all we can really know
is our own Self. Even “knowing” other people, becoming their own
nervous system and so on, is always by virtue of our own Self. There
are resonances, strong ones, with others who have touched THAT, but
it is always in terms of our own Self.

I have hesitated to call it “Brahman Consciousness” because that does
seem to put it somehow in the same ballpark with States of
Consciousness, which it most certainly is not. Rather it is Brahman
realizing itSelf, awakening to itSelf, through this particular
bodymind. It is not a state of consciousness at all. All of the
states of consciousness are enjoyable, and come and go as always, but
they have nothing to do with “Brahman” per se.

…Yes, and perhaps this is a limitation of mine, but right now I think
that is the way it has to be. There would be no real point, anyhow,
so far as I can see. Either it resonates with someone, or it doesn’t.
If it resonates, I think it’s because the Self is humming with the
Self. If it doesn’t, it’s because parts of us are focussed in
different places right now. As you say, no shame in that! (Except,
perhaps, in that I am not a particularly good teacher, which I will
freely admit. *lol*)

………………………………………

…while I respect MMY heartily (and deeply and highly), I also
(apparently) disagree with him heartily on a number of points. I am
not claiming to be a higher authority than MMY for you, of course, or
for anyone else, only to say that I am (apparently) a higher
authority than MMY for me. I found it all had to go. Jesus, Buddha,
Shankara, Amma, MMY, God — insofar as these are individual beings, I
in a sense hold more authority than any of them — for me. Insofar as
I am an individual being, I am the only one of them who is me.
Likewise, to the degree that I am/am not God *lol*, I heartily uphold
and insist upon your right and authority to be the final arbiter of
your bare truth. Why else were you created (assuming you were
created)? Anything else is not worthy of support.

…It is of course tempting to use his model of states of consciousness,
as he has outlined such a beautiful work of art. But as for higher
states, I will happily claim contentment in the enlightened state of
total ignorance! *lol* (Not other than “Brahman,” which again is not
a state of consciousness.)

………………………………………

(Oh yes — in case this is not completely understood by everyone —
everything I have ever written about any dimension or initiation or
state of consciousness and so forth — was all a work of art, just
another model or self-portrait at one point in time — and while I
hope at least some of it may be useful to someone some day in some
way, it’s not ever — please! — to be taken for my “ultimate” truth
now, let alone for yours. As always, take the best and leave the
rest. Thanks!)

………………………………………

I’ll say it again — with all due respect, if you
want “enlightenment,” poring over the various states of consciousness
as defined by someone else will not provide you with the slightest
clue as to how to “get” (t)here. Nor will embodying or enjoying them,
except insofar as you realize they are not It.

…*lol* Yup! Think for yourself.

………………………………………

*lol* Yes, there is still some sense of separation here, must be, or
I wouldn’t continually be surprised that it is all automatic after
all. As far as I can tell, though, THAT is as surprised by it all
as “I” am; it is actually THAT’s surprise. So again, we are not
separate. It seems to me anyhow that the I/not-I dance is also part
of the self-contradictory/other-harmonious chaos of life-embodied,
a/k/a “Brahman.” But as far as “demonstrating” the Sidhis goes — it
doesn’t seem that either “I” or THAT has any real desire to do that
on a regular, predictable basis. (For that matter, I don’t have a
desire to do much of anything on a regular, predictable basis.) I
don’t want to be a rock star, either. Too baroque. There’s just
no “juice” behind it. It would be kind of like — oh, I dunno — like
telling people they can be pretend “Kings” in some made-up Kingdom of
Heaven-on-Earth — just adding more weight to the eyelids, more
belief in the dream. A caricature. (But that’s just me. Maybe one of
those “Kings” will demonstrate flying to you, if you are really
really nice to him. :-))

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Yes, sorry; I didn’t mean to be completely absolutist (or is that
redundant?). I don’t always realize I am not doing anything: hence
the surprise I mentioned that comes when I do remember; I was rather
trying to point out how suprising it is when one realizes that in
truth one *isn’t* doing anything. I was attempting to explain the
deeper mechanics of why — previous ego-fantasies to the contrary —
I have no desire — no “juice” — to be a “flying siddha” per se. The
bottom line is, I have no real desire for anything much at all these
days, except maybe for something to eat now and then, and so on.
Moment to moment stuff. No overarching desires, no grand plan. I
learn a bit here and a bit there, keep the old self occupied, but I
am aware that all of such is essentially futile, or maybe more
politely a dream. The immersion in THAT was the death-stroke; my ego
still flopped around a lot afterwards, but it was dead. Just too
stupid to realize it all at once, or maybe the sword was too sharp.

This not-doing and not-desiring was not some kind of requirement for
awakening of “Brahman,” as far as I can see — far from it: We
require all possible intensity, all of our focus, to realize/insist
that we are actually taking responsibility for and upholding all of
(our own) creation, which very quickly shows us at the same time that
the old self that we previously identified with (including in my
experience the Witness) is essentially a sock-puppet, a stuffed
shirt, filled and surrounded only with air. After the self dies, we
re-animate or resuscitate it to continue Life here, and then maybe go
on polishing up the bodymind a bit just for kicks and giggles.

………………………………………

I agree that in some ways the
concept/framework of any form of duality is indeed nonexistent.
Still, your statement “when I am in that place, I am not always
there, but you appear to be, it’s ALL good” — appears to be
describing an experience, a specific state of consciousness perhaps —
  Unity, I am guessing? — but it is not precisely what I would
call “Brahman” per se. As far as I can see, when “Brahman” awakes,
there is no turning back. It is not an experience that comes and
goes; it is an understanding that permanently frees one from bondage
to experience itself. One knows one is “done,” period. (Again, this
is not to say that growth does not continue ad infinitum, but
this “done” quality is unmistakeable. From here on out, it is just
icing on the cake, something to do.)

I love Unity, but it is a state of consciousness, temporary by its
very nature — as you say, “I am not always there.” No one is, as far
as I can see. It’s just one of the Self’s or THAT’s many moods.
Trying to be “there” (or “HERE”) all the time would just be pursuing
another will-o’-the-wisp. Assuming that any of us is “there” all the
time would be putting an unnecessary wall between you and the truth,
where you are actually standing even now, feeling all the “junk” you
may actually be (or not be) feeling — whether it be anger,
frustration, and so on — or whatever it is that makes you think you
are not “there.” The lovely thing about Unity is it shows us that in
truth there is no “you” and no “I” — and this insight may free us up
from blaming the “other” enough to relax and accept what IS;
i.e “Brahman.”

I have no idea to which of you — of us — the anger and
frustration “really” belongs; I do know this however — even asking
the question is in a sense absurd, because it is in truth Brahman’s:
it is just another pattern in Brahman, a pattern between us all.
Anger IS; frustration IS; and so on — and until they are OK, the ego
will often deny, repress and/or project them elsewhere. If anyone is
repressing them, they will sometimes come blowing out through someone
else who is less repressed, with fewer ego-boundaries: usually a
child, or an “enlightened” person, or whomever. Or could it just be
that “enlightened” person’s samskaras. But there are in truth no
samskaras; it really is all Brahman, all perfect, all good, even
the “bad.” It all IS. This includes feeling pissed off, feeling
frustrated, and so on. That’s the beauty of it. It is truly all-
encompassing. Accepting these aspects of Brahman whenever they are
felt, both in ourselves and in the “other,” just helps us to
integrate Brahman more and more. And as we integrate more and more,
apparently so does everyone else. *lol*

………………………………………

…anger and frustration are more than just OK; they are necessary; they actually
drive us to find what we are looking for. As Tom might say, the spurs
of Brahman.

………………………………………

OK, here’s how it looks to me, anyhow: anything we judge, we become.
Anything we separate ourselves from and see ourselves as superior (or
inferior, for that matter) to, we end up acting out, until we know it
all as ourselves, as no barrier to THAT. When we “die” into THAT, we
are “done,” but we come back anyhow. We pick up the pieces of the
shredded ego and put them back on, so we can keep on playing here.

That ego keeps right on feeling all the same old stuff it used to —
but with a difference (maybe more apparent than real) — it is now
obviously all perfect. In a very real (to me anyhow *lol*) sense it
is universal. This may look like a cop-out, but I will say it anyway:
From my perspective, we take on everyone, everything. Everybody is
viscerally “inside” us. Not constantly as a perception thing — we
still experience all the moods or states-of-consciousness
fluctuations and so on (albeit more on demand than previously) — but
as a knowing thing, and it crops up physically at unexpected times.

This can be shocking as hell when we are tooling along and suddenly
someone literally jumps into our body. This somebody has an
unmistakeable “signature” to it; we “know” who it is. I didn’t want
to say this before, anon, but when I experienced that white-hot anger
in my belly, that “was” OMG! I figured this would be misunderstood
and taken as some kind of projection, but it is not exactly that. It
is more of an “introjection,” a taking-it-all-in. It may seem
preposterous to the other, because the other is often not even
consciously aware of those particular emotions — generally not, in
fact, or that bodymind probably wouldn’t be jumping into us. At any
rate, it doesn’t really matter who the “other” bodymind “really” is —
  once it is inside me, I can attend to it, digest it, love it as
myself. And rediscover once again that there is only one Self.
Anyhow, that’s the view from Lake Wobegon. Hope it helps.

………………………………………

Yes, whatever we experience — and that will fluctuate — is
apparently a direct response to our attention. Who is the “me” who is
experiencing or attending to this? From where I sit anyhow you appear
to be experiencing Brahman alright (what else is there, after all),
but still just a bit (maybe) from the “not-Brahman” side… if that
makes any sense. *lol* Enjoy it while you can! *rofl* You are leaning
so far over the pool you have already lost your balance! *lol*

…I recall the letting-go-of-blame (either of self or the other) by seeing it as a pattern between the loci has helped free me up a lot anyhow. And prepared me to take it all on as “Brahman.”

…I can’t speak for the experience of MMY’s conventional CC per se,
as what I took to be CC was not the be-all and end-all for me. So I
will speak to the state of THAT-awakening, which was my particular
milestone (and which while naming itself Brahman may also be “true
CC” for all I know).  When I insisted on/surrendered into perfection,
THAT completely knocked me on my ass, turned me inside out, ran me
over and stomped on me, showed me just how completely empty,
insubstantial and insignificant I and everything else really was.
*lol* In a good way. “I” “died”. *lol* As I saw it anyhow after its
death and deposition the ego was resuscitated to operate through so I
can keep on playing here. I picked up the pieces and put them on
again as best I could. I believe it is a lot harder if not downright
impossible for anyone after that dissolution to repress or deny
anything; they have no reason to; that’s one reason the newly-
awakened sometimes act so “crazy” (IMO). They are totally free.
There’s no coherent self-image to protect anymore. A case of clearcut
lucid dreaming! *lol* I believe it is far more frequently the case
that it is someone still perceiving separation who does the
repression or projecting.

…Yes, this bodymind still gets angry — sometimes through its/my own
patterns (which are slowly getting eroded, I think) — and sometimes
through “taking on” another’s bodymind, as was the case with the
white-hot anger-in-the-belly, when this body suddenly “introjected”
OMG. :-) As mentioned in the post to Rick, it can be quite a shock
when someone literally “jumps into” my body. *lol* But once they are
here, they are “fair game,” and I digest them, treat them as me,
loving that bodymind back into my wholeness, until there is once
again only one Self.

…I believe this superior/inferior judgement *may* be stepping
on “Brahman’s” toes. You are free to DEMAND, but unless your DEMAND
actually matches the (perhaps white-hot) intensity of what “Brahman”
is DEMANDING through you, there will be lack of integrity, and lack
of contentment/fulfillment. It is both a demand, and a surrender —
as Larry says, Complete Acceptance.

But! And this is a big BUT! IF this is in truth your heart’s desire,
your total desire, then so be it! Go for it! DEMAND with all your
soul (as if you had a choice *lol*), and “Brahman” will give you what
you really want (which will probably be “Brahman” yourSelf). What we
get is always a little different than what we think we wanted,
anyhow. *lol* I DEMANDED Perfection, and got it alright *lol* —
again, not exactly what I imagined I was bargaining for. *lol*

[comment on: “I do not have the authority to forgive.”]
If not you, who does?

…I didn’t perceive that the act of enlightenment itself changes the
relative aspects of who we are (although it certainly changes your
identification 180 degrees), but I do suspect that shift itself does
change how we behave afterwards. I know it did for me. Even through
the old bodymind, I did a lot of stuff afterwards I wouldn’t have
dared to do before. Not a lot of fear left. I like to think most of
that stuff was “good,” and freeing, and healing, though obviously
everyone will have their own perspectives on that.

Also, as one decides to operate again through the old bodymind, there
can be a lot more clarity on how to clarify the bodymind itself, and
this sort of self-healing *tends* to obviate a lot of the old
habitual addictive behaviors, over time. This obviously is easier if
one doesn’t get all caught up in doing the old guru trips of Master-
can-do-no-wrong and so forth. But I suppose that again boils down to
the makeup of the relative bodymind. It is probably somewhat natural
for a few years at least to play a lot of that stuff out, fulfill
left-over fantasies, be a magician or siddha or demigod for a while,
all that — just to explore and push the boundaries of being here.
Within a decade or two if and as it sinks in more and more that there
indeed is really only one of us, even on the emotional and physical
levels, I would suspect it generally gets harder and harder to cause
pain. But this is getting awfully close to saying there is only one
model for enlightenment, and I would be loathe to write any of this
in stone as any sort of absolute truth. *lol*

………………………………………

I am loathe to write it in stone because — though it is a great
mofdel in theory — I have seen how easy it is after a decade or two
to essentially ignore one’s own “enlightenment” and still indulge in
or even take up new compulsive, addictive behaviors for awhile — to
a comparatively small extent in myself, and apparently to a much
larger extent in someone like Adi Da. Many other examples of
such “flawed” behavior in the “enlightened” can doubtless be recalled
by most here, as that has been one of the consistent themes on FFL.

In many cases the behavior seems to get worse and more eccentric and
more (apparently) life-damaging over time. I think this may be
because we tend to indulge in the dream again and actually buy into —
  even if only provisionally — the idea of a separate self again,
which leads to the eventual inescapable nagging feeling of
inauthenticity, which may lead (if unexamined and unadmitted) to
addictive/compulsive behaviors as a compensation/escape from
the “black hole” of the true (non-)self. It may simply be that Maya
is an extremely persuasive lover! It would seem though that those
playing the guru-role would be especially plagued by this, as the
temptation to believe and assume the light-and-power projections of
one’s own adorers can be most sticky. Before you know it, you may be
stuck playing “God” in the dream, doing your utmost (subconsciously
at least) to perpetuate the dream in your devotees, rather than
serving as a true liberator! *lol*

………………………………………

http://www.dimensional.com/~risaacs/l8.htm

…the book [by Ed TARABILDA] seemed mostly to be a melange of
different short “rants” on society and religion, etc. *lol* Not to
say they weren’t generally right! I do not recall that he outlined
any practical technique for determining the person’s spiritual path,
but I was (for some reason) under the assumption it was based on the
ruler of the chart. (In my situation [at least using Western system]
I suppose Mars would be my ruler in both cases, as it is exalted in
Capricorn in the 10th and I was also born on Tuesday. I identified
much more with his description of the Solar path, though — as
evidenced yet again by my bringing in myself as the example here — a
classic earmark of the Solar yogi. Or maybe just a rampant egotist.
*lol*

………………………………………

I found one [book by Ed TARABILDA] in a used-book store somewhere a number of years ago and have dipped into it on occasion. Overall the book was pretty
disorganized and not all that appealing to me at the time I bought
it. I do recall enjoying juxtaposing his planetary-chakra patterns
with those in my own system and enjoying the insights into
traditional occultism that his patterns provoked. It was primarily
the Monday-Tuesday-Wednesday etc. pattern (Moon-Mars-Mercury etc.)
running down the chakras (Head-throat-heart etc.) that I found most
interesting, but of course there were lots of other tidbits in the
book as well. There was some neat stuff on the various yogic paths
appropriate for specific planetary types: I believe it was Hatha Yoga
for Saturn, Karma Yoga for Jupiter, Raja Yoga (I think) for Mars,
Mantra Yoga for Venus (lovers of beauty and the senses like MMY),
Jnana Yoga for Mercury, Bhakti Yoga for Moon, and a kind of I-
AM/eclectic yoga (Surya yoga?) for the Sun, which he associated with
the actual path followed by Guru Dev, and which I most identified
with, though the sun is certainly not the ruler of my chart. I do
still dip into it from time to time, though I am not sure I could
locate the book immediately. It was called Cosmo-Psycho-Bio-Genesis,
I believe, or something like that.

………………………………………

…I am certainly not going to try to defend the indefensible to someone whose mind is already made up so happily….

………………………………………

…the soul dies when Brahman awakes… — my experience exactly. :-)

………………………………………

…I indeed spent a number of years after THAT getting bigger, more grandiose — Master, Magician/Siddha, Demigod, God — all of this in the context of the “dream.” Seen from where I stand now, it was in one sense all still the flopping-around
last-gasp (or not) of the ego. *lol*

………………………………………

My opinions are as flawed as anyone’s. My knowledge OF anything is in
one sense obviously not perfect; it is filtered and communicated
through a specific bodymind. (On the other hand it is also obviously
perfect and in accord with everything.) The knowledge itself — the
so-called “enlightenment” — however IS perfect, or rather is
indescribable, as it simply IS itSelf.

………………………………………

Interesting. I wrote some rather arcane material on expansions of
consciousness beyond “Brahman” on this last post, including some
stuff I hadn’t realized before, which ended up on FFL blank! I never
saw that happen before. Maybe this isn’t the right time for that
stuff after all? *lol* Must be time to go to bed! *lol*

………………………………………

[Katie Byron’s 4 steps with Rory’s world view]

1. Do I know THAT is true? Yes.

2. Am I 100 % certain that THAT is true? *lol* Yes. And No. Depending
on which “I” we are speaking of.

3. What if THAT is not-true, or false? Been there. Parts of me
still “am” there.

4. What would I be without THAT? Simple. I go back to sleep and lose
my ground in the figure.  I dream I am an I that is so fundamentally
separate it doesn’t even know it is limited. I completely ignore that
white-hot pain of separation and do a pretty good job of believing
my”self” to be basically calm, rational, centered, in touch with
the “Infinite,” overall progressing nicely, maybe with occasional
backslides into irrationality or anger or whatever. In short, I dream
that I am you (or perhaps our family dog). I am familiar with this
lovely dream, having lived it pretty happily for quite some time. I —
  or parts of me — am still living it, in fact. It was only the
actual waking-up process that was painful, as it/I stripped away all
of “I” and all of the “other” to leave only THAT, Us alone, utterly
empty, utterly full.

………………………………………

I now see all the inexorable unfoldments of THAT exploring THAT —
  “Krishna,” “Shiva,” and so on — as being from one point of view the
ego’s preserving its existence. I have gotten bored with THAT at
times over the decades and played with ignoring THAT and pretending
to live a “normal” life. That I have gone so far as to (almost)
believe in the inauthentic ego and begin to watch myself adopt
masking or adaptive addictions — which of course dissolved instantly
when admitting THAT again, this time upon being “summoned” by you
here — has only served to deepen my understanding of
ignorance/enlightenment and of darshan, and my compassion for my
fellow-beings, although in truth there are no such; there is only one
of us.

As THAT I am also more and more exploring ignorance itself, seeing in
a sense how I am actually asleep, dreaming, or awake in all the
beings and qualities of my creation(s). Just another point of view,
not really superior to or inferior to that of being one or another of
my projected selves. Ignorance? Absolutely. Enlightenment?
Absolutely. Everything I do simply unfolds more of myself to myself.
I am the most fully enlightened being there is, as I am all there is,
and I am also the most ignorant being there is, as I am all there is.
Enlightenment and ignorance are both jokes, since there is only I.
How am I to measure mySelf, and what am I to measure MySelf against?
I am ignorant of mySelf; I am not only unknown but unknowable. I am
enlightened, in that I embrace this — or not, and either way am
free. Or not. I breathe, dream, make love and hate, rule and betray,
and am ruled and betrayed, slay and am slain, all over this world and
in countless other worlds of my imagination, and they are all quite
solid in their own terms, and all just me. There is nothing other
than me, including the seeming denial of me and resistance to me. And
all of this has no separate substance. Ego? Absolutely. If you want
THAT you have to come through me — as Christ reportedly said: “No
one comes to the Father but through Me.” I am both the gate to THAT
and the door barring you from THAT. Know me as the other, and the
door is barred. Know me as not other than yourself and the door
disappears, and you know yourself as the gate to THAT.

………………………………………

…you know “full enlightenment” (if by that we mean THAT awakening
to itself) cannot really be lost; it is on the level of
understanding, which is beyond being shackled to experience. However,
it can and does (for the sake of greater understanding) thereafter
provisionally ignore itself to one degree or another and explore the
dynamics of THAT projecting and projected in creation. Why not? THAT
is forever free. THAT continually plays hide-and-seek with THAT,
always discovers new aspects of THAT even when it pretends it is not.
It is invincible in its vulnerability to ignorance. This is why in
the deepest sense there is no difference between enlightenment and
ignorance; the process of self-discovery continues irrevocably.

So on closer analysis I think we can only say, THAT unfolds as THAT
should, perfectly meeting all the desires of ourSelf in and as
separate beings in THAT. If THAT chooses to play in some realms as
guru/God and devotee, what is the harm? THAT adores THAT and is
either comfortable there, or enlightened, or betrayed, or whatever
other drama THAT chooses. Everyone’s deepest needs/desires are always
met. We can never analyze the state-of-consciousness of the “other,”
unless we are that “other;” all we can ever know is ourSelf, for that
is all there is.

………………………………………

You can count the number on one finger. There is only one who is
enlightened.

………………………………………

…There is only room for one through the gateless gate, and that is the “I” behind you — the one “I”. You are the only
one who is in charge of your enlightenment or awakening; you are the only one who can open to awaken, and that old saying “If you meet the
Buddha on the road, kill him” is absolutely true. If you are holding
anyone up between you and your enlightenment, that one is an obstacle
and must be mercilessly destroyed. Slay them all! There is only THAT;
only I! In the end there can be only ONE.

………………………………………

[comment on: “so many pull the trump card of “it’s all just Brahman anyway” to explain away destructive behavior.”]
Yes, I was not attempting to justify anyone’s behavior. I was trying
to answer Rick’s question about “loss of enlightenment,” by pointing
out how it all looks from this end — not just the behavior of so-
called “masters” — but the behavior of everyone. It is all nuts and
all perfect, all evolving, constantly vibrating between I and not-I,
enjoying all the various states of consciousness, all the various
pretenses at degrees of of sleep and wakefulness, all infinitely self-
adjusting. It’s all Hell and all Heaven, all drama, all just ordinary
life.

Nor am I trying to win any sort of argument by logic — this state is
totally crazy, totally illogical. Logic really can’t touch it. As to
infallibility — the only way I found it anywhere was to realize my
relationship to THAT — and then I find it everywhere; it’s
unavoidable. That’s what “destroys” the ego, which thrives on
fallibility, its own and everyone else’s.

………………………………………

 

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