2005 March

 Based roughly on the Katha Upanishad, we can perhaps posit a general sketch of our divine anatomy as follows (the standard caveats apply that this is only a map):

Crown = Purusha (Cosmic Person; supreme Self; Subtle Spirit)
Brow = Avyakta (unmanifest; Middle Spirit)
Throat = Mahat-Atman (great mind; individual Self; Dense Spirit)
Heart = Buddhi (intuition; Subtle Soul)
Solar Plexus = Ahamkara (human self; Middle Soul)
Navel = Manas (mind; Dense Soul)
Sex = Indriyas (senses/sense objects; Subtle Body)
Base = Karmendriyas (organs of action; Middle Body)
Feet = Prakriti (Divine Matter; Dense Body)

Correction — in previous post, the Ahamkara (solar plexus) should be between Wisdom-Vijnanamaya kosha (heart) and the Manamaya kosha (navel), as below. And please note, placing these koshas at specific chakras is from Purusha’s point of view only — each kosha surrounds the entire body…

From this sketch, we could posit a standard ascent through 9 states
of consciousness from Coma/Death (Feet), to Sleep (Base; mineral
consciousness), to Dream (Sex; vegetable consciousness), to Waking
(Navel; animal consciousness), to Transcendence (Solar Plexus, human
consciousness), to Cosmic Consciousness (Heart, ancestor
consciousness), to God Consciousness (Throat, deva/gandharva
consciousness), to Unity Consciousness (Brow, Brahma consciousness)
to Brahman (crown; Purusha). (Please note that this map is distorted
in that each of these states actually enlivens the entire

However, as noted last year in conversations with OMG, I also rather
like a model of the higher states of consciousness arising from the
mutual attraction of Purusha (Spirit) and Prakriti (Divine Matter),
and their gradual approach and mergence through the body’s 9 chakras given above. From this model we could posit:

Threshold or Transcendental Consciousness when we become aware of Purusha as being somewhere “above” us (in the crown) and Prakriti “below” us (at our feet);

Birth or Cosmic Consciousness when Purusha moves down into our Brow as the consciousness of the pleroma or unmanifest Avyakta, and Prakriti moves up into our Base as divinely enlivened and automatic organs of action; the absolute Purusha now witnesses the relative Prakriti;

Baptism or God Consciousness when Purusha moves down through our Throat as the vibrant bliss of devic/gandharvic Mahat-Atman and Prakriti moves up through our Sex as divine enlivenment of the senses;

Transfiguration or Unity Consciousness when Purusha moves down
through our Heart as the awakened pitris of Buddha and Prakriti
moves up through our Navel as divinely enlivened Mind, culminating
in perfect Unity when Purusha and Prakriti first touch at Solar
Plexus – the human “I AM” or Ahamkara;

Crucifixion or Brahman Consciousness when Purusha and Prakriti cross
into each other for the first time, with Purusha reaching down into
the Navel and Prakriti reaching up into the Heart; thus
extinguishing the need for the intermediary Ahamkara; the small
human ego and individual Soul now “dies,” as there is no longer
complete distinction between Spirit and Matter, absolute and
relative, inner and outer, self and other; everywhere there is only

Mastery or Krishna Consciousness when Purusha moves down through the Sex and Prakriti reaches up into the Throat, enlivening the realization that the immense emptiful void or THAT of Brahman can now collapse and manifest fully as and into the Atman or bliss-point(s) of individuality;

Ascension or Shiva Consciousness when Purusha moves down through the Base and Prakriti reaches up through the Brow, eventually resulting in the complete mergence of Purusha and Prakriti, with each occupying the entire body: Absolute Spirit and Relative Matter are one and the same.

Again, this is just a map, a rough sketch. It certainly doesn’t
account for everything or every experience. If any of it fits,
enjoy; if not, throw it out. No strings attached! :-)

Also, I am a little unclear on the Katha Upanishad’s placement of
the objects “above” or beyond the senses — this seems to contradict
the general flow from denser objectivity to subtler subjectivity,
unless I am missing something.


…in general, Brahman still appears to be the right “niche” (what a paradox THAT is! *lol*) for those experiences — the realization that all the desired states of consciousness — C.C., G.C. and U.C. — were available at will, as a matter of attention, and that *none* of them was the deepest Truth — that what was ardently desired was only Perfection, NOW —
and that accepting and surrendering into that resulted in the
immediate death of my Soul, the old witnessing “I AM”, as “I” was
ripped open into realization of THAT which had been there all along,
ignored in my unconscious search for something other than what IS. I
cannot really speak for anyone’s state of consciousness other than
my own and how others look inside my field, and really everyone
looks pretty darn good, fully enlightened in fact, even those doing
a great job of pretending they are in ignorance for the time being.
That said, I do notice when someone is resisting the “me” in them,
and Tom is one of the few I have seen who presents no resistance
whatsover, ever. He is also the first to understand me on FFL when I
was saying that Brahman is not an experience, it is an
Understanding, actually the radical Understanding. This is something
that people experiencing C.C. and G.C. and even Unity do not, in my
opinion, generally actually get. That subtle ego or causal body
seems to get in the way, still claiming the “experience” for its
own. :-)

…the loss of the Causal body was a huge shock that took some time to get used to — the “fishbowl” quality of I/THAT/Everything presented nothing to hold on to, anywhere. Being taught “by” what I assume was Vaj’s Hiranyagarbha — which I know is supposed to be the golden egg, but to me appeared red on one end, blue on the other, and gold only around the middle — only really came to awareness a few years after that “Brahman-Crucifixion;”  a number of other unfoldments took place in between. Not having a body of my own necessitated constructing another body, an immortal “body of knowledge,” which I have been tinkering with and refining pretty much ever since. I
guess Purusha is as good a name as any. I am still not “done,” by the way. A lot of stuff associated with becoming the physical incarnation of Karttikeya, about four years after “Brahman,” was so intense that I am still processing it, 19 years later.


Not sure if at this point I could in truth
really subscribe to the gradual-purification-of-koshas model.
Rather, it appeared to be that very model kept me from finally
Understanding. From this point of view, Brahman is like the double-
napped cone, and the various states of consciousness “before”
or “inside” Brahman are like the various conic sections derived from
slicing a plane through various places and at various angles of the
cone. Thus:

Sleep as the point derived from passing a horizontal plane through
the juncture-point of the two nappes;

Dreaming as the line derived from a diagonal plane touching an edge
of the nappes;

Waking as the X or plane derived from a vertical plane through the

Transcendence as the circle derived from a horizontal plane above or
below the juncture of the nappes;

C.C. as the ellipse derived from slightly tilting the circle’s plane;

G.C. as the parabola derived from tilting the ellipse’s plane into a
diagonal parallel to the angle of the cone;

U.C. as the hyperbola or double-parabola derived from a vertical
plane to one side of the juncture-point of the nappes.

Which of these is “superior to” or “clearer than” the next? While in
one sense they do or can “progress” smoothly from one state to the
next, there is nothing that says we cannot play with them in any
other order from that given above, or go back and forth until the
properties of each are clearly understood. Rather, they are all in
one sense utterly identical, in that they each show one property of
the cone, as perceived through the “illusion” of a separate
experiencer. (Yes, this even seemed to remain in U.C.) Taking none
of them as the ultimate Truth or taking them all together,
simultaneously, one can leap beyond them to arrive at the true
nature of the cone itself: Brahman, beyond the separate plane of the
experiencer. No experiencer, no experienced; only THAT.

Oddly, though, we can draw a two-dimensional sketch of the double-napped cone as an X with two horizontal ellipses — one between its top two points and one between its bottom two points, and a close(ish) proximation of Brahman is “it’s kind of like C.C. (the ellipse) AND ignorance (the X) simultaneously”! Or, “I am fully enjoying waking-state ignorance AND utter contentment!” or something like that. But there is no separation, as there was in C.C. And there is no sense of lack, as there was in Waking State.

As to uninterrupted witnessing of sleep and so on — yes,
absolutely, if that is deemed necessary and desirable, and for as
long as it is desired. I believe that need be just long enough
to “get it” as a separate state before moving onto another and
eventually (one hopes) merging or transcending them into Brahman.
(After Brahman, a different form of sleep may well be there. For
some years after Brahman while “sleeping” each night I was gathering
information from a College in the Sirius system, which I would spend
the whole next day writing down. Also, in sleep it appears we
conjointly orchestrate the coming world-events.) Whether one is
asleep or awake is almost a moot point. Parts of “me” are always
asleep; parts are always dreaming, and parts are always awake. It’s
really a matter of attention or focus.

Beyond a certain point it is no more nor less necessary than any
other criteria, as far as I can see — and if you are using that or
any criterion to “judge” your or anyone else’s enlightenment, you
are putting the cart before the horse — binding yourself to
external phenomena, and blinding yourself to what really IS. As far
as I can see, one can never know THAT so long as one is putting any
such criterion whatsoever on it. This would of necessity reify it
out of its primordial innocence, because THAT is (in a sense) always
shaping itself to satisfy your desires, conscious or unconscious.
Dropping all such expectation, and surrendering to the perfection of
what IS, seems to be the only way to Understand/be Understood, it
seems to me.


Using the earlier model of Purusha (Spirit) gradually merging with
Prakriti (Matter), the Soul would be the intermediary between the two which was no longer needed. In that model, it would be among the three bodies of Manas (Mental), Ahamkara (Causal or Solar Angel), and Buddhi (Intuition), which had been place-holders or lieutenants between Spirit and Matter. What had happened — we might suggest – was that Prakriti had now ascended as far as the Heart, or Buddhi, and Purusha had descended as far as the Navel, or Manas. Experientially, one’s “insides” are removed and strewn all over creation, and all of creation is inside oneself. The Ultimate Ground is now Understood: Like our traditional understanding of C.C.
(somewhat) in its starkly ordinary clarity; quite unlike that C.C.
in that the witness is gone; there is now literally nothing else,
nothing other. The paradoxical (“slippery”) nature of THAT is now
directly perceivable. It is not simply Absolute, nor simply
Relative; these terms cease to have any real meaning. Indescribable,
really. The Self. (One does however put something like the Causal
Body back on again eventually, but it is no longer seen in the same
light as “I” — it is simply one of many of Us; one of our servants,
as it were.)

[Rory earlier wrote: …as “I” was ripped open into realization of THAT which had been there all along,]

…If we use the model of Purusha/Prakriti merging, “I” had been Purusha descending as far as the Unmanifest Avyakta in C.C. (together with Prakriti ascending into the Karmendriyas or action-organs), as the god-forms of Mahat-Atman in G.C. (together with Prakriti ascending into the sense – rogans or Indriyas), and as Intuition or Buddhi in U.C (together with Prakriti ascending into Concrete Mind or Manas). However, the “I” which had been interpreting or transforming or “claiming” all of these energies was the Ahamkara, or Solar Angel, in the Solar Plexus (or bottom of the heart). It was the dissolution of this “I” that accompanied the mergence and overlap of Purusha and Prakriti.
(And again, please note that this is just a rough model. We can say that Shakti arises and meets Shiva in the Crown chakra probably at every intitiation, certainly as early as the ecstatic kundalini energy-flows of G.C. There appears to be a more-or-less continuous or continual stream of energy between Purusha and Prakriti at our two poles, but that these two themselves apparently gradually
approach, overlap and merge.)

[Rory earlier wrote: …ignored in my unconscious search for something other than what IS.]

…Because of the separation of Purusha and Prakriti, held apart by the
belief in an individual Soul. Because of expectation and desire, of
subtle bondage to phenomena, of lack of responsibility, of belief in
time and space, of belief in self and other — all fine things, so
long as they are not taken too seriously. When we forget it’s our
own game or self-portrait, we begin to believe in separation and
imperfection and suffering. In my opinion, attempting to raise the
consciousness of the world, while seemingly laudable, is still
symptomatic of “combing the mirror” or attending to the speck in our
neighbor’s eye while ignoring the log in our own. And yet, here I
am, pretending that what “I” write can in any way help “you”! Of
course it can’t. “I” and “you” don’t exist; there is only one of Us,
and that’s already perfect. We’re just passing time. When the time
is right and the desire is ripe, the razor-sharp sword slices open
our cocoon and our light spills out unto and into everything. This
happened to some “one” on FFL just the other day, and I suspect on
some level every “one” knows it. :-) But maybe not. Who knows?

[Rory earlier wrote: …I  cannot really speak for anyone’s state of consciousness other than my own and how others look inside my field, and really everyone looks pretty darn good]

[Comment on …enlightened people “tickle” you in a certain way or resonate. Is this looking inside your field the same thing…?]

A little different. That would be more passive; this is more active.
Looking inside my field in this case is simply remembering that it
is all “I”. (Everything then starts to sing together.) Going to
Dunkin’ Donuts with my wife yesterday, I silently remembered this
(eyes open) for a few moments while in line and to my surprise, all
the customers and servers started smiling and laughing; everyone’s
face started physically glowing; their movements became smooth and
dancelike, as if they were at Satsang. Did “I” do this? No, yes,
maybe? (How) Does “my” attention evoke ojas in “another’s” body?
Attention is love, and love promotes evolution, maybe? At any rate,
it is slightly different from what I wrote earlier in that at that
time, I was perhaps not relaxing into full responsibility for
everything. :-) I am probably still not, but I am learning! *lol*

[Rory earlier wrote: …fully enlightened in fact, even those doing a great job of pretending they are in ignorance for the time being.]

…only from Brahman’s or Purusha’s point of view does it appear to be
pretending, just a case of where we puts our attention. We probably
can’t effectively pretend that an impurity is not there. Rather, we
have to drop the habitual pretense that it *is* there. It really is
only a dropping of all pretense, of all resistance. We could step
it “down” a level or two and say that the Universe is deeply and
passionately in love with us, and wants nothing more than to see us
fulfilled. We just have to stop blocking Her, stop giving Her mixed
messages. It is but a step or two from there to see that She already
IS giving us exactly what we’re asking for, in this moment.

[Rory earlier wrote: …That said, I do notice when someone is resisting the “me” in them…]

[Comment on …letting totally go seems to be a wise practice.]

Totally! To the max! :-)

[Rory earlier wrote: and Tom is one of the few I have seen who presents no resistance whatsover, ever. He is also the first to understand me on FFL when I was saying that Brahman is not an experience, it is an Understanding, actually the radical Understanding. This is something that people experiencing C.C. and G.C. and even Unity do not, in my
 opinion, generally actually get. That subtle ego or causal body seems to get in the way, still claiming the “experience” for its
 own. :-)
(… from this perspective, the loss of the Causal body was a huge shock that took some time to get used to — the “fishbowl” quality of I/THAT/Everything presented nothing to hold on to, anywhere.

[Comment on …Was this the bliss body? The transcendental body? Were losing each a separate experience?]

The only time it felt like a loss was that once, when the
Soul/Causal body split open. And even then, it was so obviously a
gain rather than a loss — “it is finished” — that losing one’s
soul was not a big deal compared to gaining the whole world. *lol*
Obviously, not in the sense that that scripture is normally
interpreted! *lol*

…If I am right in my understanding of C.C., G.C., and U.C.,
the “nothing to hang onto” in C.C. is indeed a taste of Brahman, but
it is all in a sense interior; there is still all of the relative or
Prakriti “out there” waiting to be resolved. The “absolute” or
Purusha and the “relative” or Prakriti have both been perfectly
cognized — Purusha as Avyakta and Prakriti as Karmendriyas — but
the gulf between them is (apparently) huge. In Brahman for the first
time, there is no real distinction anymore. No inner, no outer; no
absolute, no relative. Asleep, awake; eyes open, eyes shut: no
difference. Nothing to hang onto anywhere.

…as far as I can see Purusha maintains its various qualities of
Avyakta and Mahat-Atman; it is simply that the lower mind (manas),
ego (Ahamkara) and higher mind (Buddhi) are blown out. Rendered
obsolete. Purusha and Prakriti have then merged and overlapped into
that region, so there is no need for the separate soul in its old
function as interpreter and place-holder.

…Your questions have really helped me better comprehend this whole Purusha-Prakriti dance. It may not be absolutely correct, but I like it so far! :-)


…they [the koshas] appear to have correlates or analogues throughout the various dimensions. We can say from Purusha’s point of view the Sex chakra or pranamayakosha manifests in the cosmic body as Sagittarius (the divine Planter) and Pisces (the divine Forester), for example, and on the Tree of Nine (lokas) as the realm of the Dark Elves or vegetable devas, and so on. There is a rich and almost infinitely complex network of magical correspondences. It gets a bit bogged down if I throw in all the correlates from all the different dimensions in every posting; for those who are curious, symbolism for much of these is available in postings with OMG or Akasha last year and (in much more detail) on my website.


…I know of a number of Masters who have enlivened the Tradition within themselves working entirely or primarily from TM.


(continuing in the model of mergence of Purusha and Prakriti through
the various dimensions or “bodies”)

…So when viewed from the inside, while these processes are going on, it can get more than a little confusing. For example, we can say (broadly) that the first real awareness of the chakras, prana, AND bliss arises (or can arise) during the sense-refinement of G.C., as Purusha moves down into the Bliss-kosha of the throat, and Prakriti moves up into the Sex chakra of the sense-organs. But from the point of view of one in G.C., there IS no more; the entire body is sometimes being (or can be) ecstatically overwhelmed with
mass “avalanches” of kundalini or shakti, and the various chakras illuminate themselves; the consciousness passes up through the crown and recognizes itself as an entity independent of the physical body and space-time, and so on. (Individual results may vary.)

The attention or primary focus on all this passes when we move to
U.C., and a whole new vista gradually (or suddenly) arises.
Patanjali beautifully illuminates this latter rise into Unity with
the sutra, “when the translucent intellect becomes as clear as the
Self, enlightenment arises” (or something like that). Here he is
describing Purusha — the Self — now moving down into our heart, or
buddhi, or vijnanamaya kosha: the translucent intellect (while
Prakriti moves up into our manas, or navel, or lower mind), and its
(our) recognition of and fusion with our Solar angel, the causal
body, recognizing the Sol/Soul/ Light of Lights as our own Self.
Literally, enlightenment. The first half of the journey is now done;
Purusha and Prakriti have now met at our cosmic center. (What
remains is the journey of their overlap and complete mergence.)

In earlier posts I have pointed out the nine lokas as being subtle,
middle and dense forms of Spirit, Soul, and Body, respectively. We
can see these multiplicities as being the play of Sat, Chit, and
Ananda, or Being (Truth), Consciousness, and Bliss, but which I more
often call Love, Light, and Laughter. Roughly, the Spirit is Love,
the Soul is Light, and the Body is Laughter, and this subdivides to
form Love’s Love (Purusha; crown; subtle spirit; spirit of the
spirit), Love’s Light (Avyakta; third eye; middle spirit; soul of
the spirit), and Love’s Laughter (Mahat-Atman; throat; dense spirit;
body of the spirit); Light’s Love (Buddhi; heart; subtle soul;
Vijnanamayakosha); Light’s Light (Ahamkara; Solar Plexus; middle
soul; soul of the soul), and so on.

Since Purusha and Prakriti eventually overlap the Causal
Angel, “extinguishing” it (felt subjectively as the Dark Night of
the Soul, when our “last” subtle attachments are stripped away), and
then go on to reactivate the various chakras in reverse order, some
outward confusion may arise as to “where” on this path someone
actually is. (Again, this is even assuming that these all unfold
precisely in the “proper” order in the first place — something I am
not at all sure happens with everyone.)

Someone describing ecstatic (bliss, ananda, laughter) kundalini and prana-flows and god-forms and sensory enrichment may be experiencing their first enlivenment as G.C. (when Purusha comes down into cosmic throat’s Anandamayakosha and Prakriti comes up into the cosmic sex Indriyas of Prana), OR their second re-enlivenment as Krishna Consciousness, when Prakriti has now reached as far UP as cosmic throat’s Anandamayakosha and Purusha has now descended as far DOWN as the cosmic sex and Indriyas and Pranamayakosha: Hence the effectiveness of the knowledge that “Brahman is Prana” or “I am Prana” to help move one past the initial shock of Brahman via rebirthing or attention on breath. At the same time, pranayama would have been equally useful in moving one from C.C. to G.C. — just not yet identical to the Self, as the Ahamkara or Solar Angel was still serving as (visible or invisible) the intermediary Higher Self, and would do so until Brahman.

So this second (K.C.) enlivenment of the cosmic Throat and Sex may
appear outwardly to be identical to the first (G.C.), but inwardly
it is indeed different: In K.C. one knows THAT ALONE IS (Brahman),
and knows further that THAT can actually collapse itself into “I”
bliss-points! THAT AM I. Literally, now, “I” (any I) contain it all.
The holographic nature of oneself, first hinted at in G.C. when the
angels may show themselves to consist of multitudes of smaller
angels in choirs of group consciousness, is now completely
understood as all being one’s Self. One can now go inside oneself as
an Avatar to one’s various “children” or component I-selves, and in
so doing, be the larger Self around and enlivening so-called
Reality. Both dimensions simultaneously.

All of this notwithstanding, one may still be arguing with one’s
wife, looking for the missing car-keys, and so on. *lol*


…Time and space mean absolutely nothing.


Going into this in a bit more detail — while the kundalini-flows or shakti-flows in G.C. culminate in the realization that one is a “subtle” body independent of the physical and space-time, this is
mostly in the sense of astral-travel or soul-travel. U.C./B.C. begin to unfold the realization that all of this is now available in the physical body. In Purusha’s moving down into vijnanamaya (Buddhi or
the Cosmic Heart) and Prakriti’s moving up into manamaya (Manas or Cosmic Navel), one no longer has to leave the physical body to explore the various dimensions. Time and Space are now comprehended as illusory even now, in this moment, and soon the Guru who was installed in one’s Being in C.C. or G.C. is now comprehended as the Self (Causal Body; Cosmic Solar Plexus).


when one is in C.C., one
would not be particularly aware of the Ahamkara, even though it
filters and mediates between the experience of Purusha (Absolute)
and Prakriti (Relative). It would be the one still “claiming” the
experience; one’s own sense of individuality or soul. In C.C. and
G.C. and even in U.C., this one is still there. It thinks it is
having “experiences” of C.C., G.C., and U.C.

Only in B.C. does one actually notice this Ahamkara intensely — by
its sudden absence. Only then do we see that it was indeed a small
self; before that we thought it was the Absolute. Only in B.C. do we
actually “get” that it actually had limitations, when we are
suddenly confronted with ourselves as the Great Immensity, not other
than the relative “out there.” This is the first time EVERYTHING is
utterly the same: ground state; THAT; no small self distinguishing
between Absolute and Relative.

Unfortunately if one still functions through the small self, one is
going to interpret everything a B.C. experiencer says in terms of
the states one actually knows: Sleep, Dream, Waking, C.C., G.C., and
U.C. You have noted that Tom appears to you to be sliding around
between C.C. and U.C. To use my conic-sections model, one could
hypothesize that this is because you may still be interpreting his 3-
D cone with a 2-D lens. If you take EVERYTHING he says as
descriptions of the same state, rather than saying, “this sounds
like C.C.; this sounds maybe like U.C.,” you will be getting closer
to what he is getting at. B.C. is “slippery;” it is the field of
paradox; it is bigger than you are. It contains all the component
states simultaneously. You never really “get” it; it “gets” you.


You are (as always) doing an excellent job at taking (“2-D”) conic-
sections or slides or snapshots of the various contradictory or
paradoxical aspects of (“3-D”) conic Brahman, akasha; many thanks!

Brahman is the unchanging ever-shifting emptiful No-Self/Self/Other
Absolute/Relative. It embraces all of time-space. It embraces (all
of) the individual mind(s). The individual mind or Ahamkara
cannot “get” Peter-Brahman, because the “I” still believes in
spacetime — takes discrete moments in time as somehow “real”
(Ahamkara-Manas in action) and delights in comparing and contrasting
to discriminate and figure out which one is “really” True (Ahamkara-
Buddhi in action) — unaware that the Ahamkara-self is the very
thing in its own way. It appears the only way to “get” Peter-Brahman
is to let Peter-Brahman “get” each of us — take it all as True, or
none of it as True. Be whole-hearted, in other words. Brahman spans
the whole thing, from heaven to hell, from the infinitely large to
the infinitely small, and from the sublime to the ridiculous.

It reminds of the way the situation in Iraq has been described by
some — we are in Iraq (they say), ostensibly trying to eliminate
terrorists, when it is our very presence there that is creating more
terrorists. The only way to “solve” the problems in Iraq, say these
pundits, is to unequivocally withdraw, now; the resultant chaos will
sort itself out. (I make no claims as to the ultimate
political “Truth” of this world-view — only using it as an example
of the way it mirrors the difficulties of the ego getting in its own

As always, many thanks for providing me with some fun fodder to chew
on :-)


…conventionally-understood C.C., G.C., and U.C. are only
precognitions of the “real” C.C./Brahman. The experience of
Understanding the no-self as Peter describes it appears to me to be
very clearly the extinguishing of the Ahamkara in B.C. The state is
easily mistakable for C.C. — very stark, no support yet appreciation
of the ground-state, and so on. If so, the bliss-points and shakti-
flows and shifting consciousness he is describing more recently would
probably be K.C., not its prior-harmonic G.C. I do not recall
apprehending the ability of THAT to be collapsible into bliss “I-
points” in G.C. — this is more a hallmark of K.C., in my model.


…in my view each realm contains analogues of all the realms within it, in holographic mode, so that each realm appears to contain it all and to be self-sufficient; viewable as not-so only after one has “seen through” it.

What I am describing above as cosmic-body chakras and so forth was NOT perceivable (for me at least) in those states you describe (specifically what you have described as the progression from C.C. to G.C. to U.C.); it is just an overview or map from the point of view of Purusha — perhaps really viewable only after actually enlivening B.C. (and ideally K.C. and S.C.), and one knows that Brahman does indeed manifest; there is no other; Purusha and Prakriti are the same.

What you are describing above would in my model be translatable as
the realization of the illusory or projected nature of maya, which
begins to dawn as one moves from C.C. through G.C. into U.C., and
one realizes it is not all “out there” at all but actually within;
the world “out there” is exactly as we are, a perfect reflection or
manifestation of the play(s) or themes we are working on inside.

Here’s how I see it at the moment anyhow: The description of Brahman as the unmoved, uninvolved witness describes C.C., where Purusha is occupying the cosmic (Purushic) body as its third-eye, Avyakta, the Unmanifest, and Prakriti is occupying it as its base-chakra, the Karmendriyas, the organs of action. In G.C., Purusha has descended as far as its cosmic throat — the bliss-realm of divine archetypes — and Prakriti has ascended as far as cosmic sex — the senses.

There is still a projection of all these newly unfolded lokas “out there” as outside oneself. In U.C., Purusha has moved down into the cosmic heart, the Buddhi-realm, and Prakriti has moved up as far as the cosmic navel, the manas-realm, and one now begins to really grasp that all the dimensions of spacetime — all of G.C.’s or pranayamaya/anandamaya’s koshas — are just a movie of the mind. There is still a small but very important
(in its own estimation *lol*) distinction or boundary between Purusha and Prakriti, though, until the two finally meet at the Golden Solar Angel — the Ahamkara, at the bottom of one’s heart, or the Solar Plexus — and one knows the Guru-Christ fully as oneself. Then *bam* it all disappears, and the Dark Night of the Soul ensues, culminating in the final surrender of the Ahamkara and its no-self extinction in B.C. – Absolute and Relative have met and overlapped. “It is finished.” All this is the emptiful THAT, and THAT alone is. (Always has been; always will be, NOW.)

But actually, if we so choose, our explorations have just begun, and
now we find more and more of the realms of life reflecting the ever-
progressing merger and intercourse of Purusha and Prakriti, the
Absolute and the Relative. Now (if we like) we may begin to explore
how THAT Absolute/Relative becomes the Absolute unfolding the
Relative — the mechanics of creation; what ensues as the wholeness
begins to play with the patterns created in the Absolute among its
point-selves. Eventually we may find ourselves reconstructing and
exploring a new body — a Purushic/Prakritic body. We need no
longer “fear” maya, as we are eternally free, and She is not other
than us. Now we can make love with Her, play in Her playground; all
the angels and demons we birth together are merely our own beloved
children, aspects of ourselves (as your wonderful Chod visualization
makes so clear).

The whole thing is — if we choose to put our attention there —
completely emptiful, “nobody here but just us chickens.” And the
body and the spirit are exactly the same substance. But it’s still
fun to go inside and play among our chakra-lokas, whether they be on
the physical, pranic-astral, manasic, causal, buddhic, mahat-atmic,
or avyaktic planes. It is after all our creation, and our I-selves
love the attention! :-)


…I do not know what Tom’s consciousness is to himself; I know what he is in me. His descriptions of the actual extinction of the small self, of the death of the witness — like Peter’s — I can only identify with the
extinction of Ahamkara in B.C. — or if you like, the “real C.C.,”
though IMO this does a grave injustice to the prior states of C.C.,
G.C., and U.C., which though impermanent are valuable and in a sense
necessary, even if from Brahman’s POV still “pretend” and filtered
through a previously-unsuspected Ahamkara. Thanks to our dialogue, I
am getting a lot clearer on “where” these states of consciousness
are in the Purusha-body. They do serve a purpose.

Yes, C.C. knows the perfect duality of the Unmanifest and the
Relative, but it has no conception of the extinction of the “small
self,” the Guru-Christ-Self or Ahamkara. What has died? Nothing. We
only have the unchanging, unmanifest Self added to all the rest,
together with the appreciation that all action is automatic. U.C.
knows it’s all me, that I embrace all space-time if I care to put my
attention there, but again it has no conception of the extinction of
the unsuspected intermediating small self which is yet to come.
Again, this small self is virtually invisible until its sudden
disappearance in B.C., when the rug is totally pulled out and there
are no longer any distinctions anywhere; there ONLY is the emptiful
Great Immensity.

…logic is lovely but utterly useless where the ever-present
and non-dual B.C. is concerned. THAT recognizes THAT. That’s how I
recognize Tom to be speaking the Truth. It’s a freakin’ paradox only
the unselfed heart-belly can comprehend. Even in U.C., the self-
bound mind and the self-bound logic simply cannot quite really get
it, nor imagine it, nor comprehend it, nor describe it. I am sorry
if I implied otherwise.

Brahman for me is supremely simple, self-evident, obvious, a priori
(all of this is also a lie of course), and it makes sense to me to
assume that (every)one is in Brahman unless s/he gives evidence of
resisting that. Tom does not; on the contrary he shows every
evidence of no-self realization. So for me, right now, Tom is in
Brahman, at the very least. You are of course welcome to create your
own reality and put him anywhere you like….


Because [states of consciousness] are simple, natural, and effortless *lol* — just who you are, that’s all. Easy to overlook, obviously, but absurdly self-evident all the same. It is not especially useful to glamorize them as something beyond or outside you. Krishna Consciousness is just a natural development from realizing THAT, springing from a further
realization that hey, THAT is all well and good, but what about ME? If THAT is big enough to be everything, THAT must also be big enough to be extremely small — IOW, to be ME, to care about me, to assume the aspect of a personal God-self. Hence the sudden “collapse” of THAT into the all-inclusive bliss-point: THAT AM I, infinitely large but also infinitely small. THAT awakens to itself and becomes able to
enter inside itself as an Avatar (so to speak) of its own creation, ministering to its own component I-selves. By going into your body and,ministering to your I-selves, you are in turn the small I-self ministered by your own larger-I. A lovely loop of self-referent love-flow.

As you can see, this is overtly very similar to G.C.(not surprising since the same Purushic chakras are being activated — the bliss- sheath and the sense-organ-sheath, albeit now in reverse to G.C.), but
would not be consciousness outside you OF Krishna as (one of many) personal gods, it would be consciousness of yourself AS Krishna as personal god, as the entire Self and minute all-inclusive portion(s) of the Self simultaneously: the contraction of the infinite THAT into the infinitely blissful point(s), while still enjoying the original
THAT. Let me make this point as clearly as I can — while K.C. makes us Masters (albeit Baby Masters), it does not make us Masters of anything other than ourselves. We are barely becoming fit to run our own universe at this point, certainly not yours. That’s up to you. *lol*


Christ is another name for the Causal body, or Solar Angel, or God-
King-Self who mediates as the “I AM” or ruler of our personal Soul,
midway between the Absolute (Father-Heaven) and Relative (Mother-
Earth) until the “crucifixion” when Heaven and Earth meet in us (at
the Crossing of Purusha and Prakriti). Crucifixion, nirvana (“blowing
out of the lamp”) and B.C. are all the same in my view. As Tat Wala
Baba apparently said, God is one; it is only men [and women] who make him[/her] different.


Logic cannot embrace what I am speaking of, can only slip around it, seeing it from different snapshot-angles. You, however, can embrace what I speak of because you ARE it….You will never be utterly certain of anything until THAT gets you, though — THAT I can pretty much guarantee.


I am not here to make you Hindus, or Christians, or Buddhists, any other believers. I am not here to expound learnedly on Hinduism, or Buddhism, or Christianity. I will leave that to the scholars. I am here to give you Life, as clearly and fully as I can. To that end I use whatever concepts and analogies and scriptures and other belief-systems I have available, to try to “break your relative mind” and show you THAT which is universal. You embrace it all; I embrace it all, we all embrace it all. Nothing is outside of us; everything is our mirror. If this “mishmash” confuses people enough to let it all go and stand in the NOW, then I have done my job perfectly, and I can take my leave.

Are you sure you know what Paul had in mind when he “created
Christianity”? I am not intending to say that Christianity is
Hinduism in disguise, only to say it reveals us just as much as
Advaita, in its own language.


…Not trying to force this down anyone else’s throat. Find your own Truth. I am not your lord high poo-bah; you are. :-)


Not asking you to lose your linear, rational thinking… I am
asking you simply to quit pretending everything has to be either/or;
then-vs.-now, me-vs.-them, circle-vs.-parabola. We ARE all in this
together. Everything is part of THAT. Everything is perfect. If parts
of you feel otherwise, engage in a dialectic with those portions that
feel that way. Use that great mind… to discriminate all you
want, but then let all those lovely pieces synthesize together into a
whole. And again, you will never get THAT. Not possible. THAT gets
you, when you let it. Or who knows? Maybe I’m wrong. Your Truth will
tell you what’s right.

Which one is really “me” — a snapshot of me at 5, or 15, or 49? Who
is right — you or me?

…I know his experience better in my attention-field, of course. He
knows it better in his. And we’re both right. And so are you. Or maybe
none of us is right. The end result either way is identically perfect.
It’s not me; it’s not you; it’s a pattern between us.

…[rational mind] is not useless, it’s simply that it can only take you to the threshold of THAT. It will always try to choose one or the other; it can’t grasp figure/ground simultaneously.


Mastery of ourselves, not over you,…I must indeed have a HUGE third-chakra — the umbilical cord emerging from my navel is as thick as my body, and I’m not going to tell you what is at its far end! :-) You probably wouldn’t believe me anyway. As to datura, this small physical body has never tried it. We did try marijuana a few times, 31 years ago. Maybe you can chalk all this up to that. *lol* I never knew marijuana to ramp up anyone’s power-center, though… usually rather the reverse.


I have been taking some time off, attending to a number of you who
have “taken the plunge” into the Heart, and I would like to thank
you all immensely for your skinny-dipping leap of faith into the
NOW. How different your approaches are! One jumps in like a kid
doing a cannonball off a high cliff (what a splash THAT makes),
while others slide in so softly, so almost imperceptibly, as to make
scarcely a ripple. I see now that the “shock of Brahman” — while
indeed “like getting hit by a bus” for the likes of Peter and me —
is indeed no shock at all for everyone, as Tom has been saying all

Now: a few more thoughts come up that I offer in hopes of allaying
some of the inevitable confusion. What is your ACTUAL experience of
the nature of the various states of consciousness you had all been
taught? I think you will find that they are impermanent. They come
and go. We have highs and lows — times of happiness and Grace and
times of sorrow and Suffering. In seeking a “state of consciousness”
our desires are not yet entirely fulfilled; there is always
something more that we are hoping for. In other words, we think that
THIS is not enough. We have conceptualized some ideal that we long
for and desire. We are hoping eventually to find that PERMANENT
state of enlightenment.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with this; it is the play of maya –
– the play of desire and fulfillment. We imagine some desire “outside” of ourselves and thereby create Time and Space — a
distance between ourselves and what we desire — which we then (usually) eventually collapse into the Now, giving ourselves (some
version of) what we desired. Then the process begins all over again. It is like a carrot on a stick out in front of us. It keeps us
moving forward through space and time.

But if we want to really enjoy Brahman and “permanent
enlightenment,” to Be Here Now, it is essential that we recognize
the illusory or projective nature of this carrot-on-a-stick desire-
process. This is why I said YES! when Akasha suggested I was
delusional. All the states of consciousness, all desires
conceptualized as something not-here-now, are impermanent, part of
the play of delusion — the game of maya. The only thing embracing
them all is you, yourself. From the point of view of Now, you have
maybe always been here, and maybe always will be. But the only real
is NOW.

You are always here, watching the movie of your own making, making
up your own stories about what’s “out there,” sometimes
getting “lost” in it, sometimes not. That’s you enjoying your own
stories, enjoying maya. That’s it. The only state of consciousness
there really is, is the one you are in right now. This is the only
one that’s real. All the “others” are in a sense imaginary — in
other words, not-here-now. Your ideas about them, past and future —
your memories and desires — concretize them into snapshots,
something not-here-now. Your desires for something “else” are
actually creating the illusion of Time and Space as somthing not-
self, something bigger than you are. When we achieve a desire, we
are satisfied (because we are one with it), and we then think it was
the object of desire that caused our satisfaction, and we seek out
the same again or “better” versions of that object (or state of
consciousness or whatever).

But it is not the object of desire itself that “caused” our
satisfaction or contentment; it was our being one with it. Brahman
is realizing that This is Enough; that it is time to quit chasing
the carrot, that we now embrace This — whatever it is — whole-
heartedly. This requires letting go of all of our preconceptions,
memory-comparisons, future-imaginings, and resistances. Life is all
of it, that’s all. Absolute “Good” is Brahman; absolute “Evil” is
Brahman, or rather if you look closely, Life is both and neither. It
is both separation and union. It is both ignorance and knowing. Why?
Because we’ve experienced them both, and it is both right now. It
has to be ALL of IT. Why? Because we’ve embraced all of it, accepted
all of it. Because it IS.

I am not going to try to describe what the result of this is,
because it is literally indescribable. This is not to glamorize it,
because glamour concretizes and projects something outside of
yourself and the Now again. It is perhaps quite ordinary, and yet
perhaps not. Any description solidifies it into another conceptual
desire-picture and negates what it really is, puts a layer of
expectation and denial on top of what really is. Life is a paradox.
You will NEVER truly know Brahman so long as you have some idea of
what it is supposed to be, because in doing so you are denying the
simplicity that Life is showing you NOW. This is It. It doesn’t get
any better than this. If you think it does, look a little closer,
relax a little more, make your peace with what Life is showing you
now. It’s a necessary piece of yourself. Don’t flinch from it, or if
you do, accept the fact that you’re flinching from it. See what
story you are telling yourself about it, and note that it is just a
story. Please don’t hesitate to take the advice of the many modern
sages who put this a lot clearer than I do — people like Byron
Katie, who actually give you techniques for understanding your
projection-stories and getting Life Now. That’s it. Enjoy!


This is how C.C. looks from the point of view of Brahman, NOT from its
own point of view. From its own point of view, there is the Absolute,
and the Relative, completely separate (again, using the Purusha-
Prakriti model, C.C. is Purusha/Absolute activating Avyakta/Unmanifest
in Cosmic brow, and Prakriti/Relative activating karmendriyas/organs
of action in Base), so we get Absolute and Relative together but at
completely opposite poles. Absolute is the uninvolved “Witness” of the
automatic activity of the Relative.

However, there is also, as yet unsuspected by the person enjoying C.C., (among other elements) the Ahamkara, our personal Brahma or Causal/Solar Body or Soul or storyteller, intermediating between the Absolute and the Relative. This is the personal ego or “I AM” who
still binds the rest of the sheaths by time and space, denying the immediacy of Wholeness or merged Absolute/Relative or “Absolativity” by placing conditions upon it. So long as we are unaware of the true nature of this personal Brahma or Golden Child, we project it onto the external authority of God/Christ/Guru/Shankara/whomever. This Ahamkara remains even into U.C., though by then the Purusha/Absolute has moved down through the bliss-sheath and wisdom-sheath to touch it from above, and the Prakriti/Relative has moved up through the senses and lower mind to touch it from below. We then merge with that Solar Angel, but probably don’t yet think to apply that experience of NOW to
all of Life. We’re still conditioning the Wholeness with at least some of our habitual stories and projections and expectations.

It is not until one is willing to stand completely in the utter naked
perfection of one’s own Truth NOW, completely unattached to all
external authority and all space-time phenomena (and that includes all
states of consciousness) yet embracing it all, that the
Brahma/Personal Ahamkara/Causal Body/Guru/storyteller is seen for the non-existent “man behind the curtain,” the small self, and the “Great Immensity” of emptiful paradox or Brahman or Wholeness or Absolativity is directly Understood as our own Soul — the World Soul. NOW the C.C. witnesser is seen as having been a small self, by comparison to the Wholeness which has taken its place.

I hesitated to write again of this, because I suspect this may add yet
another layer of glamorizing and conceptualizing and concretizing and
projection over the simple immediacy of NOW. But it seemed to be a
problem for you, and so what can we do? We do our best. Hope it helps.


…Rumi is the greatest, isn’t he? He understands and expresses so
clearly how “hunting” with the relative mind and logic gets us
nowhere finally but further enmired in maya and suffering; until we
are willing to stand alone supporting it all in perfect
sufficiency/vulnerability as the hunted, we cannot truly lose/find
ourselves, be crucified/cross over, be and not-be, and Understand/be
Understood as the paradox of Life/Death and no-time, no-space in the
NOW of Heaven/Earth. Thank you again. You rock! :-)


It cannot be easy to have to embody the sheer frustration of the relative mind in running around plugging all the
holes in the dyke. Would it really be so bad it the land were
completely flooded? That tidal wave is for you; it is Life ItSelf.
Rumi’s boat was shattered, but he found a plank to float on; I bet you
will too.

At the risk of confusing you further by switching to another metaphor,
you are apparently still trying to dissect Life and to keep all your
little pieces neat and separated into sterile little boxes of
spacetime: Me, You, Him, Her, Maharishi’s teaching, Tom’s teaching,
Rory’s teaching, Peter’s teaching, Shankara’s teaching, Christ’s
teaching (Yes, but HIS is a circle and YOURS is a parabola!). You have
my sympathies. I know you will be fine though — and probably have a
lot more fun along the way, if/when you decide to quit resisting the
inevitable. You’re already dead and gone, you’re just too stubborn to
admit it. :-)

Again, I deeply appreciate the part you’ve played in your having
stimulated me to finish the Work. You’re the greatest! Thank you again.


I believe, Tom, that your intuition probably brought up the Gunas in
direct answer to Vaj’s question about being taught by the
Hiranyagarbha. I am quite struck by this, anyhow. As mentioned
earlier, originally for me the Hiranyagarbha was a spheroid: blue at
one end, red at the opposite end, and gold around the middle — kind
of an Easter egg. It’s occurred to me that the egg’s blue, red and
gold were probably the gunas. A few days ago I checked Alain
Danielou’s “Hindu Polytheism” and he mentioned that Vishnu
represented the cohesive, centripetal force of sattva; Shiva
represented the dispersive, centrifugal force of tamas, and Brahma
represented the rotary motion of rajas. This didn’t make a lot of
sense to me in two dimensions, but I suddenly remembered my old
fascination with the torus — visualizable as a nice fat doughnut,
or a sphere with a hollow core flaring out smoothly at top and
bottom to blend with the outside skin. This hollow core looks rather
like (in two dimensions) a carved Roman-capital I, with flared
serifs, or (in three dimensions) a Christian chalice, or our old
friend the double cone.

Now if we put the blue at the south pole of this toroid-egg, we have
Vishnu or Narayana (probably originally Indra), overseeing His
umbilical cord or “black hole” of Prakriti or proto-matter getting
sucked up sattvically and centripetally toward the center, where it
ignites and rotates as the golden dynamo-embryo of Brahma (our
rajas, raj, or Ahamkara-ruler), thundering out His “vedic” commands
like solar flares as He rotates (symbolized by His four heads).
When “done” here the matter begins to disperse as it continues
further northward until it flares out tamasically in a “white hole”
centrifugally as the red Shiva (clearly, originally Rudra) at its
north pole. It then wraps down around the outside of the egg back to
the south pole and Vishnu, where it begins all over again.

This magnetic-field-like torus-shape would appear to be the
prototype for everything with an inner-Brahma or Ahamkara, from the
atomic scale through the human and global and up to the Universal.
From the cosmic point of view, there would appear to be “really”
only one Ahamkara, which upon entering maya or space-time is
reflected into its countless pinpoints of I-Am “stars.”

I am also reminded of the various insights around the time of K.C.
or “Mastery,” some of which involved combining the three primary
rays of Theosophy (red, yellow, and blue: again, the three gunas),
and subtly ascending a “pyramid” (probably the lower half of the
double cone of the torus) which contained, like Tom’s experience,
the fiery column of my own DNA — again, in No-time — until I
reached an immense OMMMM and popped through it out into a council of Masters.

I would say now this looks a lot like swooping up through the bottom
half of the Hiranyagarbha-toroid until reaching Brahma and his
council, seen another way perhaps as Aditi and the Adityas.

Finally, though I am not a Mason, I think we may see very strong
echos of all this in the Masonic ritual of Mastery — the
three “ruffians,” each with a piece of the Word (the three gunas and
A U M) and so on…

To play with a few of your other questions, Vaj, I do not recall
losing any body other than the causal. This did indeed for awhile
feel bodiless in a most disconcerting manner. My old sense of self
was lost; my old physical body no longer “meant” anything in the
sense of boundaries. I no longer had an inside and an outside. While
on the one hand Understanding mySelf fully within and without as
everything Wholeness, neither Absolute nor Relative — completely
the “same” –was completely satisfying, it  still felt quite
rudderless for a few days of utter ordinary paradox until “prana is
Brahman” showed me how to enliven the emptifullness. I do not
remember at this point the issue of specific chakras, except for a
lot of activity around the navel and heart (which matches my current
Purusha-Prakriti model nicely). A few years thereafter, at any rate,
the (inner) body was indeed a single blazing “sun”, with no clearly
distinguishable separate chakras (to me at least). Prana was still
very much involved in further alignment and refinement. Though I was
of course unaware of it at the time, this also now matches the
Purusha-Prakriti model — where the cosmic bliss-sheaths and prana-
sensory sheaths are re-enlivened much as they had first been long
before in G.C.

Now: as this model shows the movement entirely one way, from the
bottom up, I believe it is only half the picture: the time-flow of
Prakriti. It appears that from Purusha’s point of view, time flows
in reverse. Spirit and Matter are one — the same substance — just
polar opposites in Time-space-flow.


Looking at the Wholeness Body of Purusha/Prakriti, we see Prakriti
moving “northward” up through the Body in (potentially) 9 stages,
which we can see matches symbolic primordial castes of human states
of consciousness in the social body. (Connections to the 9 Realms of
the Norse Tree of Life given in parens.)

In the Feet (T.C.), the human is completely bound to maya and
primordial Prakriti (Hel), hence is of the “slave” or servant caste.

In the Base (C.C.), the human is now “free;” his actions are
automatic: working with the karmendriyas and their outward
manifestation as the mineral kingdom (Realm of the Dwarves) —
hence, the artisans.

In the Sex (G.C.), the human is now working with the pranas and
indriyas and their outward manifestation as the vegetable kingdom
(Realm of the Dark Elves) — hence, the food-growers and merchants.

In the Navel (U.C.), the human works with the manas or lower mind,
the animal kingdom (Realm of the Fire Giants) — hence, the
warriors, the “knights” — traditionally the ones allowed to ride on
horseback. This culminates in…

…the Solar Plexus, where the human identifies with the Causal Body
of the Ahamkara or Solar Angel, and works with the Human kingdom
(Middle Earth). S/he is thus the Ruler, intermediary between Heaven
and Earth. (Crossing through this center, this intermediary or
Causal Self “dies.”)

In the Heart (B.C.), the human is “born again” or “twice-born,” and
identifies with the enlightened Buddhi, and works with the Ancestral
kingdom or realm of the Pitris (Giants). Since these humans are
knowers of Brahman as themselves, they are “Brahmans.” These would be presiders over the ritual, the Intuitives or Oracles. However, there would be three or four subcategories of Brahman(s), the others being sketched below.

In the Throat (K.C.), the human identifies with the Mahat-atman and
bliss-realm, and works with the Angelic or Devic realm (Light
Elves). These would be the magic-speakers — the (en)chanters,
mages, singers, and and bards (Pundits).

In the Brow or third-eye (S.C.), the human identifies with the
Avyukta and Unmanifest realm, and works with the God-realm (Vanirs).
These would be the Seers or Rishis.

In the Crown (M.C.), the human identifies with Purusha itself, and
working with the realm of the Siddhas (Aesir in Norse, Aes Sidhi in
Celtic) would serve the Whole. These would be the Great-Seers or


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